Here I am, and You're Dairy Queen

I once went to the Dairy Queen on South Street in Philadelphia and ordered a chocolate milkshake. The person behind the counter informed me that they were out of milk and chocolate ice cream. I think that If you claim to be some sort of potentate of an entire food group, then you really shouldn’t be running out of it. You don’t see this sort of thing happening at Burger King. If they ever ran out of meat, I’d like to think they’d do the honorable thing and demote themselves to some loyal level of royalty, such as Burger Viscount.

Dairy Queen could have least made up some story, like “We found a severed head in the milkshake machine and we’re waiting for the cops to show up and dust for fingerprints”, but they couldn’t even do that. Dairy Queen failed in their primary mission, which is to provide me with tasty chocolate milkshakes. I went to Hagen Daaz instead.